


Werewolves

by using_this_name



Series: Crackity Crack [25]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Bottom Dean, Crack, Drabble, Gangbang, Humor, M/M, Were-Creatures, Werewolves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-18
Updated: 2013-05-18
Packaged: 2017-12-12 06:17:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/808265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/using_this_name/pseuds/using_this_name
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean has a full moon related problem.  Well, dilemma. Ok, more of a slight issue.  Wait!  Where are you going? This is important, damn it!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Werewolves

**Dean:** Hey, Sam. I got you that crab meat you wanted for dinner. And the extra bag of salt.

**Sam:** Awesome. I wanted to tell you…

**Dean:** Fine. But can I go first?

**Sam:** Sure.

**Dean:** Thanks. Remember that pack of werewolves we took out last month?

**Sam:** The ones you ended up having sex with instead of killing the first three times we stormed their lair?

**Dean:** Whatever. You totally would have done that Alcide dude too if you had the chance.

**Sam:** I did, and I have. Just not while trying to kill him.

**Dean:** Yeah, well, you wouldn’t need to.  Not with your magical Heath-Ledger-killing penis.

**Sam:**  We had sex one time! I didn’t kill…didn’t you have something important to tell me? I have a bath running…

**Dean:** A bath, Samantha? But anyway, this is important. Your bath can wait.

**Sam:** Actually…

**Dean:** Quiet! Where was I? Oh yeah. So, while I was, y’know…

**Sam:** Having kinky werewolf sex?

**Dean:** Yeah. I made sure that no one bit me, cause…

**Sam:** Even though you are a huge bottom boy who loves pain, you didn’t want to become a supernatural creature?

**Dean:** I don’t bottom!!

**Sam:** Are you saying that Alcide bottoms? ‘Cause I happen to remember that…

**Dean:** Shut up! I’m not a bottom. Just adventurous. We switched off…

**Sam:** I would believe you if I had caught you with that Oz kid we met a few years ago. Who, by the way, is phenomenal in bed and a total bottom. As it is, not so much.

**Dean:** Whatever. So, I wasn’t bit by anyone…

**Sam:** And I know how hard that must have been for you…

**Dean:** …but it turns out that having, um, very macho relations with several werewolves can also turn you. You know, if there is a lot of…fluid…exchange.

**Sam:** Ah. So you’re saying you were gangbanged by a pack of werewolves, and the overwhelming were-semen turned you?

**Dean:** Exactly.

**Sam:** But you’re not a bottom?

**Dean:** No! I’m adventurous!

**Sam:** Mhmm.

**Dean:** Anyway. That’s not important. What’s important is that I’m now a werewolf, and tonight is the full moon, so…

**Sam:** Have you been angsting about this? Cause you know they weren’t _that_ kind of werewolf. They change voluntarily, and their minds remain intact. We only killed them because they kept pirating ‘Dr. Sexy, MD’ DVDs.

**Dean:** I know, I know. It’s just…

**Sam:** You feel uncomfortable being not entirely human?

**Dean:** No! It’s just…

**Sam:** This is new to you and you’re scared?

**Dean:** Of course not. It’s just that a werewolf’s sex drive increases during the full moon, and so I was thinking we could have a sex marathon…is your eye moving? I mean, to the other side of your face?

**Sam:** Damn it!  Okay, Dean. You need to get Cas to deal with your huge I-need-to-have-more-sex identity crisis, ‘cause I have more important things going on. Give me the salt and the crab meat.

**Dean:**  What?

**Sam:** Remember when we were hunting those undines? And I told you I thought a fish bit me? And you laughed at me and called me a girl?

**Dean:** Duh. I remember every time I ridicule you. I have it written down in this journal…

**Sam:** Not now!  It turns out I _was_ bitten, and now I’m a were-animal as well, but not the good kind like you. You go have sex with Cas. I’m gonna put salt and crab meat in the bath and spend the full moon as a halibut.

**Dean:** Your eyes are on the same side now. Looks pretty creepy. So, just to clarify, you’re a were-halibut now?

**Sam:** It would appear so.

**Dean:**  Man, I’m gonna need another journal.

**Sam:** Whatever. Just don’t forget I’m in the bath and try to have shower sex.

**Author's Note:**

> If you are interested in more frequent updates, I will be updating this series on tumblr daily at this point, and probably only weekly here. So! Follow me on tumblr, where I am going by using-this-name (with dashes instead of underscores).
> 
> I would also LOVE any prompts that you would like to send me on tumblr. Any pairing, or any trope. It may take some time for me to get to it, but I promise I will. I mean, I have an SPN Founders Fic coming up. So anything you send, I will at least try to fill. :)


End file.
